Identify and Resolve

This was advice I was given today:  Simple, Honest, Direct... and undeniably true.  This is primarily how I deal with any situation given to me, except for a 'taboo' few that I make far more complicated than they should be.  Those few being things that are all 'love' related, primarily my kids and my love life.  (Love Life sounds so fucking lame... who says shit like that?) 

All of life's issues can be addressed by that simple mantra, 'Identify, and Resolve'.  Broke your leg?  Go to the hospital.  Wrecked your car?  Call the police.  Lost a testicle by masturbating with heavy machinery?  Staple the wound shut, and go back to work.  I had an issue this week with my Smart Phone (Hereafter referred to as 'Fucking Smart Phone'), it stopped taking a charge.  I had to wiggle the damned cable to get it to start charging, then when I let go, it would stop and I'd have to fuck with it again.  I realized that I rely on this goddam thing too much... it is my only phone in the house, and it is my alarm clock.  At the time I found out it wouldn't charge at all any longer, it was 4 am on a work night, I had to be up at 6:15, and MAYBE I had a few beers that night.  So, what did I do?  Lost my alarm clock; pull up laptop and open an alarm clock page and set it to 6:15.  Problem solved.  Then, it turns out it is pretty difficult to wake up after 2 hours of sleep from an unexpected binge drink, and I slept through the laptop alarm until 7:50.  Phone was still dead, was due in to work at 8.  What did I do?  Put some pants on, drove 1/2 a mile to mom's house and called the only work phone number I could remember to talk to the boss.  Problem solved again, sure some stress but not an insurmountable situation, just a pain in the ass. 

I am obviously adept at operating in this fashion, and it has proven to me that it is the correct way to do things.  Identify and Resolve.  Why the hell am I crashing every few days then?  Because it takes an incredible amount of strength to behave this way, even with practice.  Because you have to have iron control over your emotions to not let things escape in to insanity.  You have to train yourself to assess any situation, consider possible solutions, and act.  It also takes a certain amount of cold-hearted ruthlessness to maintain this state.  And, I am not a robot, or Sherlock Holmes.  Or Sheldon Cooper from Big Bang Theory.  Or many other terrifyingly driven individuals who can drown all noise and achieve their goals with pin point accuracy. 

Love is one thing that cannot be categorized in an 'Identify and Resolve' manner.  People do not work that way.  I suppose some do, but those are lonely, cold bastards.  I fucking HATE human beings, but to hate them is to love them too... to understand them, to know why they deserve to be hated and loved.  I am a bad person... and I am ok with that.  I am bad because I am a person.  I am not any worse than any other person, and by giving up the idea of love, I give up being a person.  I am a piece of shit, just like EVERYONE else, and there is nothing anyone can do about it!  I am quite satisfied with that.

That said, it is a good place to reside when things do get overwhelming.  Nothing should be overwhelming, not now, not ever.  I have had as many life events as anyone else my age, some better and some worse, and have made it here mostly in tact.  So have Billions of other souls on this earth before me... and most of them didn't have a Fucking Smart Phone to do it with!

Identify... and Resolve.  Done.



The Angry Man