Offense - Christmas

It's Christmas time (in Hollis, Queens! Mom's cookin' chicken and collared greens! Anybody?) and the Angry Man is pissed off. Too much dumb shit goes on at this time of year, and I want to get it all out so I can enjoy myself for the rest of the month. I LIKE Christmas, god dammit, but these motherfuckers insist on pissing in my cornflakes. So, in no particular order, this is why I'm mad. HO HO the fuck HO!

1. "Happy Holidays". This pisses me off, but not for the reasons it pisses other people off. I'm SUPPOSED to be pissed off that in the last decade, the American public has been brow-beaten into changing the affectation "Merry Christmas" to this. At least, that's what the dozen emails I've gotten so far tell me. THAT is what I'm raging about; these hate-mongering, militaristic, cunt swab WHITE Americans that simply cannot fit the idea into their heads that America is a diverse nation. It is THE diverse nation, where NO one can claim a lineage of more than 200 years. (Except the Native Americans, whom do not have recorded history dating much farther beyond that. I'll be sure to apologize to both of them if I see them!) So why in the Christ-loving FUCK do white people feel so threatened by something as simple as the advent of Kwanzaa? Not all Americans celebrate Christmas in the 'traditional' way, but does that change the message? The 'Holiday' season is the time to remind those that you care about THAT YOU CARE ABOUT THEM. Not to be pissed off that someone else calls the day by a different name. Why do you think both Kwanzaa and Hanukkah are in the same month as Christmas? It's just an end of year celebration centered roughly around the time of the solstice. Be fucking happy their are other people showing their love for their friends and family, and don't waste time (yours, or especially MINE) with hate mail and anger.

2. Depression. Depression goes hand in hand with the last quarter of the year. Why is that? I'm sick to death of seeing and hearing all the mopey, sad motherfuckers bitching about how bad the holidays are going to be this year. "I don't have enough money!" or "My kids aren't getting gifts like the did last year!" Shut the fuck up with that noise. Kids are kids and they will be happy with the free stuff you are giving them; if they aren't, then that's their problem, not yours. Same with your spouse, your parents, your friends... any dick that doesn't accept a gift from you is a douche-bag, and doesn't deserve the gift in the first place. Buddhism talks about suffering, and one of the causes of suffering is CRAVING. You are craving the love and acceptance of others, and that is what causes your depression. You get upset because you are concerned that your kids aren't going to like the gifts you got them, or that you didn't or couldn't get them enough gifts. Think about that. Your sad demeanor is not BECAUSE people don't love you, but because people do not love you in the way you THINK they should... you are not getting the attention that you THINK you deserve. STOP THAT!! You are a human being, and are as deserving of love and respect as much as ANYONE ELSE!! PERIOD!! It is YOU that is causing these negative vibes, YOU that has these expectations of those around you to treat you a certain way. Love YOU, because YOU are the only YOU you are going to get.

3. Advertising. Advertising is a small thing, but it really exacerbates the entire issue. I guess that is the point of advertising; to convert people to your point of view. Like religion. So many of these kids toys look so amazing on TV... but when you get them? They only do EXACTLY WHAT THEY SAID THEY WOULD DO!! Not all the cool shit you see them do on TV! You see kids driving these remote control cars through barricades and running over bad guys and doing all these spin tricks and shit... but when your kids (who, lets face it are NOT trained stunt drivers) get hold of these toys, all they do is drive forwards and backwards. No special shit at all, just exactly the minimum that an electrical engineer could come up with to make a machine function. Why isn't this shit outlawed? Why are big advertising companies allowed to manipulate our society by playing on our weaknesses and hidden desires with such overt scams? Society deems marijuana to be illegal, and especially the SELLING of such drugs to be illegal... how is this any different? Remember the commercial "Hey... it'll make you FEEEEEEL GOOD?" These tactics blatantly take your selfishness and insecurities and RIP THEM APART! For the sake of making a buck! FUCK why is this still allowed...

I covered quite a bit of shit the pisses me off on here, so I don't feel the need to go into any more bullet points. Let me just close with my plan for this Christmas... One gift. For everyone on my list, I will buy just ONE gift; One item that I have put consideration into and determined that this is the BEST gift that this person that I love should receive from me. If they look at me funny when the open it, oh well! I know (and hopefully they know), that I tried. That I bought them a gift that I felt, through my impression of them, that they needed. That is what love is; consideration for your fellow man. Now, fucking chill out, and have a good time with your 'loved ones' this year...

Merry FUCKING Christmas

The Angry Man

Offense - Religion pt. 2

I saw something on my way home today that made me want to pick up something heavy and smash somebody with it. This post is titled 'Religion' because what I saw has something to do with religion, or rather the atrocities that are enacted in the name of religion. I know you can't say "All Christians are assholes" or "Muslims are camel humping cock-mongers" because its not ALL people of any faith whom perform bestiality whilst hoarding penises... Just the ones who take themselves (and their religion) just too god damn seriously to be allowed out of doors unsupervised.

I was on my way home from the store in the pedophile van, and I saw a mini-van in front of me with two bumper stickers. One said "Marriage = One Man + One Woman" and was sponsored by a website nogaymarriage.com; the other said "Body piercing saved my life" and it had a picture of a hand with a spike driven through it (as in crucifixion). It took everything I had not to squeal the tires in my piece of shit and ram that motherfucker into the guardrail.

First of all, who the fuck cares who someone else marries? HOW does that in ANY WAY affect YOUR life? Why should anyone other than me have a say in to whom I can pledge a sacred vow? Two men, two women, one man and 5 women, an Irishman and his sheep... who cares? Be happy that another human being found love and is expressing it publicly. Gay people have a hard enough time getting by in society as it is; leave these people the fuck alone!

Second, why are the religious (and Christians in particular) so threatened by this? Does the advent of gay marriage some how invalidate an individuals faith? Faith is defined as "Loyalty or allegiance to a cause or person." So, if Ben Roethlisberger and Payton Manning (I think so, anyway) get together and 'brown' it up, this somehow makes YOUR belief in Jesus less sure? Is it because you believe God wouldn't allow such a thing to come to pass? That God is disgusted by homosexuals? But, didn't God create each and everyone of us in His own image? Then how is it possible that we have any power whatsoever to go against 'almighty Gods' design?

And, why drag Jesus name through the mud with your message of hate? People are assholes, but I cannot believe that religion was designed with any amount of hatred as its intent. Jesus was a good man... Same as Mohammad, Buddha, the guy from Latter Day saints, all the prophets ever named; all good, decent men. Emulating the finer points and attitudes of such good men is a pretty good idea. I just cannot believe that ANY of these men spent any time HATING someone else. That said, how can any person who calls themselves a person of faith use up any energy with hatred and prejudice? And then, have the audacity to attribute it TO their faith?

Finally, the last thing that chapped my ass: It was a mini-van. A fucking FAMILY vehicle. So this douche-bag cunt is teaching her family these same values. Starting a new generation of hate mongering ass wipes, enacting violence and prejudice on their fellow men and women... in the name of Jesus Christ. WWJD, what would Jesus do? Samuel L said it best: "...And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know My name is the Lord, when I lay my vengeance upon thee." Then commence with the pious bitch-slapping of these ignorant, self-hating, arrogant pricks.

Grrrrr...

The Angry Man