Offense - the Beginning

That is to be pronounced "O-fence", not "OFF-ence", as i will not be talking about fucking football here. As you can see, the fact that i used the word "Fuck" in the first sentence, this will NOT be a PG-13 narrative. As my intention is not to O-fend anyone, you may want to go ahead and surf somewhere else. If you were invited here by me, which is likely, i am letting you know ahead of time that it will not be pretty.

I named this blog Offense not because i just want to write a bunch of offensive shit down to get a rise out of people. I honestly don't give a blue fuck what people say or feel about what i may write, and that is really the point here; that i O-fend people by the way that i talk and act in my 'normal' life. I spend an inordinate amount of time defending myself, and soothing sore feelings about things I've said or done, and that stops here.

I'm not a mean guy; not at all. The people who 'know' me, (which is a shockingly small number considering i was married for 10 years) know that I am kind and decent and go out of my way to help others, to the exclusion of even my own needs. If i have a dollar and you didn't, we would soon both have fifty cents. And yet, i still found myself back pedaling and defending my position CONSTANTLY. People ALWAYS found fault with the things that i said or did, accusing me of being uppity or cruel, acting like i was better than other people. I've NEVER believed i was better than anyone; hell, the people who 'know' me would know that i've studied Buddhism for the last 8 years, and that I believe everyone comes from the same pile of clay, no better no worse. Even if i said shit like THAT to people, they will say "Oh, he thinks he's so great, like he's a monk or something!" Well, FUCK you, maybe i do! Get a life yourself instead of passing judgement on mine!

I don't think like 'normal' people do. For instance, i don't say "How are you?" to virtually anyone... UNLESS i actually care how you are! If you have been sick, i will ask. If I know you to be having personal problems, i will ask. If it is a monday morning and i meet you on the street for the first time, why in the holy jesus ass fuck do i care how you are doing? FOR WHAT REASON am i going to say "Hi, how are you?" only for you to say "Fine, how are you?" Its not that i do it out of some deep need to be a jerk to anybody, or some freaky desire to stand out... Its just not in my mind to ask a complete stranger how they are doing! it never occurs to me to ask, because i just don't care!

Also, as you've noticed, i like the word 'Fuck'. I use it all the time; everyday conversation, talking to my mom and dad, to my kids, to my boss, all day every day. What better, more versatile word is there in the English language? Fuck the fucking fuckers who don't fucking like it! My step mom liked the word "Evidently" in the same way. Though it is not nearly as useful as 'Fuck', everything to her was 'evident' that it should have been noticed or done. As it turns out, 'Fuck' is not a generally accepted word in society: asking for a 'Fucking McFlurry' will get you thrown out of McDonalds (Trust me, i know!) But, it is the way that i talk. Do i allow my kids to use it? Fuck no, they're kids! But, should i shelter my kids from something as simple as a word? Or, should i teach them when it is 'polite' to use it and when not? (You know what a bad word is... Holocaust. Rape. Patricide. Does channel 6 censor these words? Fuck no!)

I think you get the gist of things. I am writing this because i need an outlet for these seemingly 'strange' thoughts that i have, and i haven't found a place that isn't censored. I've found that a lot of my 'friends' on Facebook have blocked my feed... i know that because NONE of my comments show on their pages, or comments i may make to someone get deleted. I could take O-fence to that, but i won't. (Being ignored is one of the things that O-fends me.) I know now that Facebook isn't the place to talk about things... it is a place to ask "How are you?" to people you never see and with whom you have no other connection.

As i go along, i'm going to pick topics that O-fend me, and tell you why. That is the beauty of a Blog... you came here on purpose to see what i had to say, so if it O-fends you, it's your own fault, not mine. I'm going to post this link to Facebook, i imagine i'll get a million dings of people saying "I hope that motherfucker isn't talking about me!" I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, or for anyone to feel that i am attacking them; it is a treatise on life, on my view of the world. Take it for what it is, or don't take it at all.

One last thing, my first thought for a name was Angry White Man, but i knew that would label this forever more as a racist dialogue, just because i said 'White". Angry Black Man would be OK to do, but me stating the fact that i am caucasion in the title is just 'wrong'. I think that will be the first subject that i talk about...

The Angry Man